Seven Mary Three would be considered one of those one hit wonders of the alternative 90's that actually had some great music. Their hit songs "Cumbersome", 'My, My" and "Waters Edge all came off of the album American Standard and was their only commercial success. Even though they went on to make a total of seven albums, they will always be known for American Standard. The entire album was full of great American Post-Grunge Rock music. Even though it is not one of the hits off the album, the song that always stuck with me was the song "Lame". "Lame" is the story of a mulatto boy that was an outsider and would go to parties to try to fit in, yet stay in the corner by himself. It is told from the side of one of the popular kids who feels bad because he never did anything to try and help the boy. I never knew what mulatto meant, even when I was an adult and this song came out. I am not ashamed to have been ignorant to the term, because race has not meant anything to me since I became old enough to actually meet people of all races and learn that we are all the same. The fact that the songs speaks of someone of mixed race just made it that more powerful to me when I finally learned the meaning. The song held a deep meaning to me as I have been both the outcast and the lame.
I have been that boy in the song, sitting there not knowing what to say, just wanting to fit in. I have felt the pain of thinking that no one cares about you and that you are all alone in a crowded room. Trying so desperately to just find someone that wants to talk with you. The loneliness can eat you away at times.
I have also been on the other side too. Being in groups of friends, having a good time , and then seeing someone that is there that does not fit in. Although I can say that I never made fun of anyone, especially after having been on the other side, I rarely spoke up and did anything to stop those that I was hanging with from making fun of or putting down the ones that did not fit in. And that is why I identified so closely with this song. And just like the person the song is coming from, I hated myself for not speaking up....I felt so lame.
Every time I hear the song, I think back to long ago when I would not have spoken up for fear of alienating myself. So many times I tried to fit in with a crowd that I did not belong in and allowed them to cause others mental harm by not speaking up. How many times did I ignore someone who I could tell did not know how to fit it. Why did I never walk over to them and just say "hello". But I didn't because I was lame.
Today I am a different person. I have grown and learned more about life and myself. I will now not tolerate someone treating anyone else poorly. I will always stand up for those who don't know how to stand up for themselves. And I will continue to do so as long as I have a voice. I thank god for my kids because they are such amazing children who accept others no matter their race, religion, or disability as friends without question. It never even seems to cross their minds. I am not sure if the talks we have had about accepting others has had much to do with it, but they truly make me proud. I just wish I would have been as amazing as they are when I was their age. But I was too damn lame.
Here's a tall, a mulatto. boy I know
And he comes to every party - he stands alone
Viewing them the rest, from the corner of his glance
It gets so clear, he's not judging anyone
The way his arms float around his cage, he's caged
Canary sings, silently brings, his voice to rage
The way they stop and stare, the way they turn their heads
It's enough to make him want to run away
But he stays, he stands his ground
And I'm so lame
The way I condescend without ever knowing his name
He keeps it in a box, hangs it from his ear
Looks at everyone without the slightest fear
It's making me so ashamed
Slender body, slip through his glance
I don't give him a single chance
The way he's rocking back and forth
Makes a buzzing in my ear
Constantly reminding me that I never stop to hear
Him say hello, hello
And I am so lame
Like a moth bumping off his godless flame
I cannot condescend or even apprehend, what comes over me
When I see his shameless face
So rage, please rage against me
Beat me down, beat me down, forgive me
For what I've done, I'm so lame, I'm so lame, I'm so lame
So lame, so lame, so lame
If you feel like you are all alone, please remember that you are not. There are so many of us out there that feel the same. Maybe even the person across the room from you that is acting so brave. You never know how others feel inside. He/she could be scared of not fitting and and doing what they can to try and fit in themselves. They could be hurting just like you. Please remember that there are so many that feel the same as you. Don't give up. Not on yourself, not on who you are. You are special and you are worth the struggle it takes to get through the rough times. Take it from someone who has been there...
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